Willpower. Where on earth do people really get their willpower from? I struggle with habitual eating and my main problem is I drink tea, probably five or six cups a day, and every time I drink tea I have to have something to eat with it. It might be a biscuit or a bit of cake, a chocolate bar, a bit of toast (or two!) spread with LOADS of butter. If I drink tea without eating anything I can often feel sick afterwards, which passes after three or four minutes. That’s probably something to do with the tannin in the tea but also it’s a habit. I don’t drink tea without something to ‘mop up the wetness’. I can drink fruit juice or squash (I don’t drink these very often) without eating so why not tea? I can’t bear to give up tea, it’s such a big part of my life. My downfall is at about 9pm when I sit down to relax in front of the telly. I cannot stop myself from making a cup of tea with………chocolate, bit of cake, biscuits, whatever sweet thing I can find. If I ditched the ‘last thing at night’ cup of tea then I wouldn’t eat the food but having a ‘last thing at night’ cup of tea is part of the relaxing process. It makes me feel more snuggly and cosy.
How do other people deal with their habits and changing the way their mind thinks when it comes to food?

Hi Wobbles
Is the tea you are drinking sweetened?
Could you substitute some of the bad stuff with some other better snack (ideally you shouldn’t be snacking that often but you have to start somewhere) -A few nuts or plain yoghurt maybe?
Sounds like you should try and cut down on those cups of tea….you need another diversion
I found exercise helped (not something I’d ever done before and I didn’t enjoy it!) a quick burst of HIIT took the cravings away, it took willpower but helped in a multitude of ways (reduced eating, increased fitness, burned some calories etc) Just start by doing a few minutes and build it up if you can, if you can’t do few minutes do what you can and build it up.
Clear out the cupboards and don’t buy those snacks, if there not in the house you won’t eat them!
Sounds like you need to ditch the sugar, easier said than done but worth it, you need to loose your sweet tooth….
Good luck, make a start!

“If I drink tea without eating anything I can often feel sick afterwards, which passes after three or four minutes ….. I can drink fruit juice or squash (I don’t drink these very often) without eating so why not tea? I can’t bear to give up tea, it’s such a big part of my life ….. If I ditched the ‘last thing at night’ cup of tea then I wouldn’t eat the food but having a ‘last thing at night’ cup of tea is part of the relaxing process.”

I have studied and worked in lifestyle healthcare (smoking cessation, healthy eating, physical activity). Some of your language is very similar to how tobaccosmokers or alcoholics talk about their habit and the associations (very often with de-stressing or winding down). Each cigarette or each cup of tea or each alcoholic drink is a separate bad habit with a separate set of rituals to change. Very often the mental side of addiction is much stronger than the physical side.

The first stage is changing unhealthy habits or aspects of addiction is recognising and acknowledging them just as you have done here. The next step is planning the change: making it much harder to engage in the unhealthy habit and much easier to engage in a healthier habit.

Let the people around you know exactly what you are planning, exactly why (ill health or a scare?) and clearly request their support. Anyone who cares about you will want you to be happy and healthy. If the people around you do not listen the first time, say it clearly again (and again and again).

If you cannot resist the temptation to have a biscuit/ cake/ chocolate/ butter DO NOT buy them in the supermarket and DO NOT have them in your home. Stock up on healthier alternatives that have a similar natural crunch and similar natural sweetness (eg. sliced apple/ carrot sticks/ flavoured nuts and seeds/ homemade granola/ root vegetable crisps).

Plan to change as many other parts of the tea-and-sugary-snack ritual as you can. Use a different mug, have a different hot drink (eg. proper cocoa/ fruit tea/ green tea/ Horlicks/ tea with lemon), walk out of the kitchen whilst the kettle boils or your new drink brews. Do more than just think about it, write your plans for your new relaxation ritual down.

Sit in a different chair or different spot on the sofa, move your coaster to a different side table, hold your mug in the hand you would normally be eating with, set your new mug down on the side you would normally have a little plate. Learn a simple mindfulness, breathing or meditation technique from YouTube and use this during your new evening relaxation ritual.

Sounds a little strange but this method is proven to work: UK National Health Service and other ‘behaviour change’ professionals use it with their clients or patients.

HTH!

“If I drink tea without eating anything I can often feel sick afterwards, which passes after three or four minutes ….. I can drink fruit juice or squash (I don’t drink these very often) without eating so why not tea? I can’t bear to give up tea, it’s such a big part of my life ….. If I ditched the ‘last thing at night’ cup of tea then I wouldn’t eat the food but having a ‘last thing at night’ cup of tea is part of the relaxing process.”

I have studied and worked in lifestyle healthcare (smoking cessation, healthy eating, physical activity). Some of your language is very similar to how tobaccosmokers or alcoholics talk about their habit and the associations (very often with de-stressing or winding down). Each cigarette or each cup of tea or each alcoholic drink is a separate bad habit with a separate set of rituals to change. Very often the mental side of addiction is much stronger than the physical side.

The first stage is changing unhealthy habits or aspects of addiction is recognising and acknowledging them just as you have done here. The next step is planning the change: making it much harder to engage in the unhealthy habit and much easier to engage in a healthier habit. Let the people around you know exactly what you are planning, exactly why (ill health or a scare?) and clearly request their support. Anyone who cares about you will want you to be happy and healthy. If the people around you do not listen the first time, say it clearly again (and again and again).

If you cannot resist the temptation to have a biscuit/ cake/ chocolate/ butter DO NOT buy them in the supermarket and DO NOT have them in your home. Stock up on healthier alternatives that have a similar natural crunch and similar natural sweetness (eg. sliced apple/ carrot sticks/ flavoured nuts and seeds/ homemade granola/ root vegetable crisps). 

Plan to change as many other parts of the tea-and-sugary-snack ritual as you can. Use a different mug, have a different hot drink (eg. proper cocoa/ fruit tea/ green tea/ Horlicks/ tea with lemon), walk out of the kitchen whilst the kettle boils or your new drink brews. Do more than just think about it, write your plans for your new relaxation ritual down.

Sit in a different chair or different spot on the sofa, move your coaster to a different side table, hold your mug in the hand you would normally be eating with, set your new mug down on the side you would normally have a little plate. Learn a simple mindfulness, breathing or meditation technique from YouTube and use this during your new evening relaxation ritual.

Sounds a little strange but this method is proven to work: UK National Health Service and other ‘behaviour change’ professionals use it with their clients or patients.

HTH!